Let Go And Let God part 2

In part 1 of this series,  I wrote about how my life path and journey are undergoing a major renovation.

I’d like to share where I stand now and what I’m thinking I might be doing as I move forward.

It has to do with something I learned from when I attended Alcoholics Anonymous.

I’ve been clean and sober coming up on 20 years now.  I’ll share that story and the lessons learned another time.

Anyhow, they would use slogans that were very helpful with the healing process. One of my favourite ones was “Let go and let God.”

To the uninitiated this doesn’t mean being passive or apathetic. Quite the opposite.

If you’re a hardcore materialist you may have some trouble with this, but please bear with me.

Our Universe is a field or grid of energy. At this subatomic or quantum level, everything is connected and holistic. Intelligent.

We could be likened to bumper cars at the midway. The more we can tap into this higher source of energy, the more power we have.

Trick is, it’s one of those counterintuitive things. We have to let go and get out of our own way in order for this Intelligent Power to flow more freely into our lives.

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Infinity

As far back as I can remember, I’ve been aware of eternity. Infinity.

As a child, my father ( a pilot and navigator in the armed forces) told me that the Universe was infinite.

He explained the concept of infinite as being without end. He wasn’t 100% “bad” — which is why I’ve forgiven all that happened between us in the past.

I love my father. He was doing the best he knew how at that time. So was I.

My mother grew up participating in the church. She sang in the choir, and did something called CGIT (Canadian Girls In Training — I think it’s kinda like the boyscouts or something).

She told me God was everywhere and in everything.

I can recall what I felt thinking about infinity. I tried imagining what that was.

Then I perceived that there really was no end.

Because if there was, there’d have to be “nothing” on the other side of the line where the Universe ended.

And how could there be “nothing?” Even the nothing would be something. Not to mention, if there was no end, there was also no beginning.

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Sidenote: Wrapping my mind around God being everywhere and in everything was a little harder, and made me slightly paranoid 😉

This was all at around the age of 7 or 8.

Also, from what I can gather, my father is or was an atheist or at least agnostic. Perhaps humanist. He never told me, and I never asked.
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The Observer And The Observed

I have another vivid memory from about 5 years of age when my family was living in Winnipeg.

I went to a neighbors house with kids around the same age where we usually played in their basement.

As I went down the stairs, I had a sudden flash from a bigger and deeper part of myself.

“Oh…I’m here again!” “Here” meaning this planet earth. And a feeling of having had many previous lives.

Another memory from about the age of 14 or so. And this actually was part of an ongoing process that has become an overarching theme in my life…

As I would lie in bed at night, before sleeping, I would find myself observing my thoughts.

And I would wonder who is it that is observing the thoughts? Am I the thinker? Or am I the observer of the thinker?

And I would notice that the observer had been there all my life. Unchanging.

It didn’t matter how much my mind or body changed, this perceiving intelligence (my true “primordial” self) was changeless throughout.

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Later, in Toronto, once I had work and a girlfriend and a room in a rooming house, I would give informal talks about these kinds of things to my friends.

I was reading a lot of J. Krishnamurti and studying things like astrology. These sources of information verified the kinds of insights I’d been having.

Oh yeah…and during my first few months in Toronto I remember feeling the presence of an angel beside me as I walked up Yonge St.

And I knew somehow I wasn’t imagining this. I “knew” it must be my guardian angel.

This silent loving presence soundlessly and wordlessly communicated to me that I was safe. Not to worry.

Well, I’m not going to write about the details of my adventures during those times. But the fact I came out alive and unscathed truly is a miracle.

So why am I telling you all this? Definitely not because I think I’m “special.”

I personally believe that there are many “old souls” here on the planet who have had these kinds of experiences — but due to the pressure of society and the mainstream worldviews have dismissed them.

And over the years, they’ve lost touch with this type of intuitive information.

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I’m definitely feeling a deeper sense of purpose right now as I think about somehow putting my voice out there.

For people who feel isolated and live in the margins of society. For people who have struggled and want to stop struggling.

For anyone looking to have a deeper sense of connection with themselves and Life.

For anyone who is just trudging through their days without a sense of direction or passion and purpose.

I don’t care what your beliefs are. I’m not here to talk politics or religion.

I’m here to shine a light so that you (if you’re still reading this you must be interested) can feel safe to shine yours too.

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If He/She Can Do It, You Can Too

“If he can do it, I can do it too!” kind of thing. That’s how AA worked for me.

The light doesn’t belong to anyone in particular.

It is the essence of who we are. Before we get programmed by a fearful society.

These fears may have had a place in the distant dark past of humanity — but most fear based beliefs are no longer necessary or relevant.

The world is changing rapidly. Not just in the areas of the economy and technology.

But in the overall frequency if you will.

More people are waking up. And then falling back asleep of course (usually in traffic or when the ticking of the clock gets louder), but nonetheless waking up.

It’s very exciting!

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The more smart and heart felt people who aren’t afraid to shine their light, the more the world will begin to shift into a more positive and healthy direction.

These blog posts are the first small step in dealing with how Life wants to express and create through me at this point in my life.

I will probably continue to blog on these topics. Perhaps make videos as well.

Music? Not sure yet. I haven’t formally practiced in 10 days now.

That’s the longest I can remember in at least 20 years.

I’m deliberately taking a break so I can allow my true nature to emerge without any bias to it. No agenda.

I want the truth of Life to shine through me. I surrender absolutely to what that truth is.

I feel music will still be an integral part of my life. The other day while teaching a student, I had to sing a passage for them — and my heart jumped for joy at singing.

And I’ve been singing around the house more recently — and loving it.

I have to play guitar when I teach. And I’ve had a couple of times where I really came alive inside while playing.

But that’s the point. I want to keep my music free. Free from agendas. Free from being a workaholic.

Free from obsession. Free from being so attached to any specific outcome.

I want the joy that I bring to my music to remain unsullied as much as possible. So for now, my music is under my watchful eye.

Until I know that it can breathe and flow naturally without me trying to make things happen.

If you don’t understand any of this, and you think you need to “make things happen” in life, that’s ok. In my experience, it doesn’t work. Not for me. Not anymore.

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Going With The Flow Of Abundance

In my experience it’s more about remaining grateful and feeling abundant. And then allowing things to happen.

Of course, action needs to be taken. Roll up your sleeves and all of that.

But it’s what I like to call aligned action.

Kind of like going down the rapids in a kayak. Using the paddle to steer and work with the flow of the river.

And guess what? Just got a brand new car from just that type of mind set.

Read Part 1 Of This Series

Go To Part 3 Of This Series

Let Go And Let God part 1

This is Part 1 in a series.

I had been so inspired with my guitar playing recently.  I’d been practicing and thinking about it virtually non stop since early fall 2015.

And this after playing most days of my life since my teenaged years. Self taught.

And of course, I’ve been teaching guitar professionally for 22 years now.

I also majored in guitar at one of Canada’s finest music colleges. Graduated at the top of my class.

After graduation, I did a bunch of things guitar related. Played in cover bands, original bands (lots of girls!), solo gigs at conferences and weddings (nice pay!), started my teaching biz.

Played a thousand open mics. Literally.

Not to mention that last year (2015) I finally was able to produce an EP of 5 of my songs of totally professional quality.

This is no easy task — even though home recording is so accessible. To learn the engineering and then use the equipment to get professional results is a formidable task.

With some help and mentoring (Thanks Gary!), and lots of practice over the years, I was finally able to do it in my small home studio.

I also had support from many of you who are reading this too — by pre purchasing the CD “Hey Mary Hey.” Thank you 🙂

This is all just to say that guitar and music has been a big part of my life and my goals.

A few weeks ago, I decided to google a service in GTA (Greater Toronto Area for those not familiar with Toronto, Canada — or T-dot for short) to fix a minor issue with my guitar amp.

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Fuzz Pedals

It led me to a guy in the suburbs who builds his own amps and guitar pedals from scratch. All based on the gear in the late sixties and early seventies.

Point to point hand wired amps, germanium transistors in the fuzz pedals instead of silicon. Vintage.

The stuff that created the magic tones of Jimi Hendrix, David Gilmour (Pink Floyd) and other “guitar heroes.”

The amp, pedals and guitar one instrument of only wood, steel and glass.

I was intrigued and inspired by his concept when we chatted over the phone. So I decided to go to his shop and check out a germanium fuzz pedal.

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Frustrated Geniuses

The day before I was scheduled to head over, he called me up to confirm. We ended up chatting a bit more about the music business and being a musician.

He said something completely unintentional that hit me like a ton of bricks.

He said something along the lines of “Yeah, like those frustrated geniuses that think they need to suffer for their art. They’re still really trying to make their music work.”

And I thought “Is that me?” And this question continued to work it’s way into my consciousness for the rest of the day.

And while I slept and dreamt that night.

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The next morning, a Monday, I was “dazed and confused.” I didn’t know what was happening to me.

I was able to function, but I was just going through the motions. I felt disconnected from my usual surroundings somehow.

I decided it was some weird temporary thing and that the best thing to do would be simply push through with my original plans as best I could.

I drove out to the burbs and met Steve. The guy who builds amps and fuzz pedals, etc.

I tried his pedals. Sounded great, but I wasn’t excited because I was so zapped out from not knowing what was going on.

“Was music even my thing anymore?” I kept asking myself silently.

I saw how Steve had a young family (a couple of toddlers), a nice little house and a rack of guitars and gear.

He basically played for fun, and while I was there another dude showed up to pick up a Marshall amp that Steve had fixed up for him.

I decided to get the fuzz pedal in the hopes that I was just in a temporary delusional state — and that my “normal” inspiration and confidence would return.

I handed Steve a wad of cash after the other dude left (after he handed Steve an even bigger wad of cash).

I thought “Wow. Steve’s just treating it like a hobby. And look at the money!”

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Money

Ok. Money. A hot issue with everyone.

Everyone is either chasing after it, or they have an aversion to it.

Or some “driving with the brakes on” combo of the two. But we all need it.

note: Money is also a cool tune by the above mentioned Pink Floyd. It’s in 7/4 time.

In the past, I had mixed programming regarding money. I grew up in a middle class home where money was not the problem.

The problem was an abusive father. Physically and mentally.

I don’t want to get into that too much other than to shed some light on things.

And there may be readers who have similar issues and they can benefit from my story.

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Because of the relentless pressure from the relationship with my father, I decided to leave home at the tender age of 17 and I ended up on the streets of Toronto.

This lasted for a little while until I was able to start getting work, etc. I was directed by a compassionate hostel worker to a social worker who helped me.

I was able to use their phone, get a resume typed (yes, typed!) up, etc. Feel some acceptance for who I was.

Others in my family (uncles, cousins, etc.) were even upper middle class and a couple were even rich.

I saw that people weren’t necessarily happy, therefore money wasn’t the source of happiness.

Nothing external is. External things reflect our happiness –or unhappiness — back to us.

Or they are simply neutral and we project our stuff onto it.

Toward the end of high school, I  thought that when I did earn a living, I at least wanted to do something I enjoyed.

Not just for the money. Something I could feel passionate about.

So part of my programming came about as a reaction or rebellion to the way I was brought up.

I was kind of anti money. Definitely as far as the “keeping up appearances” kind of having money.

Plus, starting on the Toronto streets (hanging out in the Eaton Centre and Salvation Army drop in centres to stay warm — very tough at Christmas watching the shoppers) and scratching my way up from there — well, let’s just say I missed more meals than your average college student.

Besides the rebelliousness toward money and the WASP (white anglo saxon protestant) status quo of my family, I also developed “poverty consciousness.”

I began to believe that I was less than others. I didn’t deserve.

I formed these false beliefs from my first years being on my own with little to no support.

After many years of working on myself and various issues, I think I’ve made some great progress.

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Changes

In the areas of health, I’m doing great. I’m full of vitality and regular exercise is an installed habit.

I don’t smoke or drink and have no trouble sticking to a healthy diet.

I’m also with my soulmate. We’re going strong coming up on 10 years now.

We’re a team and to me she’s absolutely the most fascinating and incredible person. And of course, very beautiful!

We’re wiser and stronger and more loving together.

I’ve managed to survive for the past 20 plus years with not much more than a guitar, my musical skills and my understanding of human nature.

But now I’m not certain where I stand in relation to my musical journey and goals. A major shift has occured.

Read Part 2 Here.

Peter Green British Blues Style Guitar

Here’s some “behind the scenes” of how I practice. It’s a music appreciation lesson meant for anybody. You don’t have to be a musician to appreciate it. Hopefully it’s user friendly for everyone.

I call it Peter Green British Blues Style Guitar because it’s based on a song by Peter Green’s Fleetwood Mac called “Need Your Love So Bad” (1969) an old school RnB/Blues and rock kind of tune. I’m using a Fender amp with tubes and my Les Paul.

note: I’m joking in the video below where I say my amp goes to 12. There’s a line in the classic movie “Spinal Tap” where Nigel, the lead guitarist boasts how his amp goes to 11. Most amps have knobs that are numbered up to 10.

My knobs happen to be numbered up to 12. The number on the knob of course, is arbitrary. The amp is either on full blast or somewhere else in the loudness continuum — regardless of what the number on the knob says 🙂

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Some people call this style “British Blues.” People like Eric Clapton, Peter Green, Jimmy Page, Jeff Beck, etc.

These guys developed their own style of music in the mid to late sixties. They were influenced by the great blues musicians from the US like Howlin’ Wolf, Muddy Waters, BB King, Albert King etc.

But they were also influenced by Elvis and rock n roll music. Not only that, but the technology of guitar amplification was at a certain development — and they took full advantage of this.

Actually, Jimi Hendrix could almost be described as a British Blues player because he made it “big” when he relocated to London.

And with all the psychedelia influence, the Beatles and Woodstock in the air at the time — well, these factors combined to create this sound some call British Blues.

In the video I use a pedal — the silver glowing thing on the floor. Those guys didn’t use pedals too much. My amp is way loud — even at 1 or 2 on the volume knob. Of course, my amp goes to 12 😉

As a guitarist, I’m always looking for things to practice to stay in shape and to keep learning my craft.

I do various things. Scales and all that stuff. But that gets pretty boring after all these years! I do a lot of lifting. That’s finding music I like and learning it by ear. Playing along to it note for note.

Of course when I record my songs, I learn a lot by creating the guitar parts in my arrangements. And in the past, I’ve logged countless hours in various bands which is another kind of practice.

In this case, a great guitarist and guitar teacher based in NYC named Jeff McErlain published some guitar lessons based on British Blues.

sidenote: Jeff is also the guitar coach on the movie August Rush. Here’s a link to his site if you’re interested in checking out what he does.

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I bought his course to have another practice option. Turned out it’s a lot of fun!

As mentioned above, Jeff based this performance study on the song “Need Your Love So Bad”  by Peter Green’s Fleetwood Mac in 1969.

The chord progression is really cool. I love these kind of progressions. For any musicians out there, it goes A, A7, D7, D#dim, A, F#min, Bmin, E, A, D9, A, Eaug.

It’s in 6/8. Romantic and wistful.

I really love playing blues rock on my electric guitar! As a singer/songwriter I also love playing my acoustic steel string. Acoustic steel string guitar is another beast to master. I’ll have something about that coming soon — and perhaps also how I keep my voice in shape.

Trivia: One of my favourite singers? Billy Ocean. Yep. Great to practice to for me — my range matches up to his really well.

Awesome! You made it. I hope you enjoyed this little slice of my life as a musician. Please feel free to leave any comments below or share this article with friends. I really appreciate it 🙂

What Is Success?

Loaded question. What is success? My version of success has changed. I think the standard mainstream version of he or she with the most toys wins has really had it’s day.

Let’s move on from such a constrictive view, shall we?

My old version was never about the money per se, but it was definitely about winning the approval of others.

This was conditioned into me quite strongly through the usual methods. Society, teachers, family, etc.

Conditioning seems to be either a conforming to or a  reelling against some kind of belief or behaviour.

Through a hodgepodge of environmental and genetic factors, my own particular idea of success developed.

Of course I’m talking about my old and now outdated version of success.

The one that drove me for many years. Seeking approval from something or someone external to myself.

Even when I became acutely aware of the tendency of the mind to seek approval and was able to weaken it through awareness and practice, it still frequently dominated me.

Ah! Being human.

 

Breakthrough

In a book I love and own called “The Inner Journey Home” by A.H. Almaas, he suggests the soul has an embedded code that unfolds when it’s ready.

The best analogy I can come up for this is that of a seed. A seed has certain codes of information that  unveil the next stage of the seed’s journey until it become “fully realized” as a plant or tree.

I’m sure in your life you’ve felt a certain way about something or someone and suddenly found yourself with a change of heart.

This is your soul unveiling information as you unfold more fully into your potential. Spontaneous intelligence.

For a long time I thought I wanted or needed to be a famous musician in order to be loved and accepted.

And in order to love and accept myself.

Recently, I noticed the suffering from feeling this missing in my life seemed to be growing weaker.  (I’m not a famous musician! Lol)

And even if I were (a famous musician), I’m pretty sure my mind would find problems elsewhere in my life. A critic, a fan, somebody sold more records,
somebody burned me in business, etc.

Today I suddenly realized it’s pretty much gone. At least the edges have definitely been sanded down and smoothed away. I’m not saying the fantasy never plays out in the back of my mind — but that when it does, I don’t suffer. No pain. It’s not Reality.

And I also realized I’ve quietly been building my own values and version of what success is.

 

So, What Is Success?

My parents wanted me to be a doctor or business executive. Really badly! I didn’t want either of those things. When I was younger I wanted to be a pro athlete. Probably hockey.

Then as a teen, I shifted to wanting to be deeply involved in music. I loved it so much!

So just what is success? Is it money and fame? Lots of sex with desirable partners? Big house and cars?

As I said above, these models seem to be slowly fading from mass consciousness. It’s definitely still there, but there also seems to be a growing disillusionment with this version of success.

 

My Version Of Success

Excellent Health: The body is the temple for your awareness and existence. Many people treat their phones and cars better than they treat their own bodies.

Loving And Supportive Relationships: What’s the point of having a bunch of stuff if you don’t have anyone to share it with? Or if you do, you’re so busy with making money and fame that you don’t have any time to be with your loved ones?

Prosperity: Gotcha!! My version of success definitely does NOT mean being poor. I think a healthy pocketbook is an essential ingredient to be able to be and do things on this planet. However I do think everyone should find there own definition of prosperity.

For me it means a balance. Being able to pay my bills without having to worry or juggle finances in order to do so. Being able to save and invest a portion of my income. Being able to afford the tools I require to do my work and express myself creatively. Being able to take time off without feeling anxious.

I don’t require a mansion or a yacht in order to feel prosperous. But if they float down the river of Life into my experience, I’ll accept them gratefully!

I have a personality that can be happy with the simple things. Right now I live in an apartment with my wife and we share a Toyota Corolla.

And I’m happy anyways. No matter what. Almost all of the time. Even when I’m “unhappy” I’m able to turn it around in a relatively short time.

Which leads me to another ingredient in my recipe for success.

Emotional Mastery And Spiritual Connection: A human being cannot be happy where sorrow is.

If you’re feeling emotional pain— or you’re just simply uninspired by life — then you need some kind of tools to help you clear that stuff away. So that the core of who you are — unconditioned happiness — can shine out.

Don’t believe me? I’m soft in the head? I’m pretty certain even the most hard boiled of materialists and cynics have had moments of happiness with no apparent cause.

Just a moment where the burdens drop and you feel at ease and at peace with everything.

It could be in Nature. For many it is. A sunset, a mountain or ocean. They reflect the majesty of your true inner essence and for a moment you experience it.

Creative Expression: Yes!  Although I’m no longer all that interested in being a famous musician because of all the probable sacrifices involved — such as time spent with loved ones, time to reflect or do other activities I enjoy, etc. — I absolutly LOVE creating and playing music. Everyday. Except for a few “cherry picked” days off.

I’m still working on finding ways to create my music and share it with a community of people who appreciate it. If you’re reading this you’re a big part of that.

I love to perform, but I don’t like bars that much. So I’m still looking for ways to perform in the Toronto area — eventually even Southern Ontario and larger. But I’d like to do it in a way that’s not just another rat race. The musician rat race.

I can perform as often and as close to home (or far from home) as I want.

I’m not in that rat race of making an album, touring, and then doing it all again. Eventually just burning out.

 

My Version Of Success In A Nutshell

  • healthy, loving and supportive relationships
  • excellent health
  • prosperity
  • emotional balance and connection to Life and the Eternal.
  • excellence in my craft

 

Congratulations — you made it to the end. This was a pretty long and winding road of an article!

Please leave me a comment below or share with friends 🙂

Why Do I Do It?

 

Hi. My name is Davidson and I’m a music addict. This is maybe dramatizing things — and I certainly don’t mean to make light of people who are involved in 12 Step programs. Been there.

What I mean is that I make music because I love it so freakin’ much! I love to sing. I love playing guitar. I love creating meaningful lyrics and cool melodies.

Why do I do it? I’m on a mission from my soul.

 

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It’s a part of my DNA.

Due to the nature of the world we live in, it’s not always “practical.” I mean in terms of cash. Yes, there are people who are doing really well in the music biz.

But the fact is, most people in the world are busy — and couldn’t care less about my new song or album.

I’ve spent times in my life where I’ve worked really hard trying to change that. My main incentive was that I wanted to play more music. Might as well try to get the earth to spin the other way. Talk about carrying the weight of the world!

Now, I can’t say I don’t care — but I definitely care much less than I used to. I do it for myself. I want my music to be as honest as possible. Hopefully that will resonate with people and that will be my service to them.

This is not to say that I’m not like anyone else and people’s appreciation of my work is not important. It’s awesome! But I look at it more like “gravy” or “icing.” I do my best not to expect it.

When I was a teenager and I consciously or subconciously decided to be a musician for my career, I didn’t do it to be famous. Even though I suffered from incredibly low self esteem at the time.

We’ve all been branded by some trauma or another during our formative years. Some worse, some less so. Mine was probably leaning toward the “worse” side of the spectrum.

That’s a big part of the reason why I ended up homeless, on the streets and on my own in a new city (Toronto) at the tender age of 17. ‘Nother story, ‘nother time.

That’s probably also what led me to have my mid life crisis in my late twenties. I started asking all the important questions that most avoid. “What am I really doing with my life? What is love? What is happiness? What’s the point of it all? Who/what do I really want to be/do? etc.” I couldn’t avoid them if I wanted to survive.

I really and truly don’t care about being famous or “special.” I just wanna be myself, work hard, and be able to pay the bills with a sense of ease and lightness. Who doesn’t?

Perhaps there are people out there who are motivated by fame and being special more than by the process of creating and playing music. I don’t know.

I only know that for me, I don’t seem to have a choice. I simply love making music. And I love learning about music. I love growing my skills.

 

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Down To The Crossroads

I’ve been down to the crossroads several times in my life thus far. Where I’ve been on my knees or even in fetal position — asking if I’m on the right path. Because it’s so damn hard!

Sometimes I wish I didn’t love making music so much so I could just concern myself with “getting by” and then “getting away” when I’ve had enough of “getting by.”

The grass is always greener.

Whenever I’ve tried walking away from music, something deep inside me knows better. And I know that if I want to respect myself, to be myself, I can’t.

Regardless of whether or not the world ever pays attention to my work. Or on what scale.

I’m mostly at peace within myself now. I now know that come hell or high water, I will do my best to continue to build upon my body of work.

It’s taken me 15 years to get to the point where I could get the financing and resources together in order to record 5 of my songs in a way that I’m very proud of.

I’m not going to stop now. I’ve been writing songs since I was a teenager — and I’m writing new songs now. To me, they’re the best songs I’ve ever written.

And I’m getting better all the time. Better guitar player. Better singer. Better arranger. Better with my lyrics.

 

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In The Past

In the now distant past, I felt very fortunate to have landed a job as the guitar teacher at a few music stores. This led to my “falling into” having my own teaching business with guitar and piano.

I thought “I’ve got the perfect day job!”

However, the reality of trying to live on “poverty wages” in the city of Toronto began to wear me down over the years.

Don’t get me wrong. I do not believe the world owes me a living.

And even if I have to flip burgers at MacDonald’s (God forbid!) in order to eat and have a roof over my head I will continue to build my body of work.

Before I graduated summa cum laude from Humber College Jazz in Toronto I worked many hours doing hard labour. Digging basements, moving furniture, cleaning crew, prep cook, short order cook.

Whatever. That’s the past.

 

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I Have Good Karma!

Fortunately, I’m still teaching and enjoying interacting and supporting my current students with their musical goals and growth.

I’ve also managed to develop a couple of other side income streams (such as some session work and helping my wife Mary with her businesses).

So for now, I am definitely a lucky person. I’ve been able to significantly close the gap between who the world wants me to be and who I truly am.

I’ve been able to somehow hold onto and nurture my artistic vision through thick and thin. I’m very grateful for that.

Maybe I’m just stubborn and hard headed.

Author Steven Pressfield, in his book The War of Art says this is a good thing. Alright — I’ll take it! 🙂

In the old days record companies and publishers had Artist Development. I guess I’ve been working my own Artist Development program all along.

Most people aim to take the freeway in order to develop their goals in life. I took to the side roads and stopped at all the villages along the way. No worries. It’s all good — I now know I can take the freeway if I choose.

 

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In A Nutshell

I’m simply going to do my best to continue creating more songs. There are still many obstacles ahead such as financing projects and making the time for them to get off the ground, but my spirit feels good.

A little scared, but good 🙂 I know my true happiness is on the inside independent of circumstances. Doesn’t mean I don’t want to be, do or have things.

Just helps me maintain sanity in an insane world.

I am becoming ever more my true self in a world where we are taught not to be.

If you enjoyed this article or think it would benefit someone, please comment below or share it. Thanks 🙂

Practicing Persistence

This story is all about practicing persistence. But Life is sometimes funny, no? It cannot be grasped by the mind. Just when you think you’ve got it, it wiggles and squishes and morphs away into a new shape.

Practicing persistence can actually bring up opportunities to practice other qualities such as patience, compassion and humour for oneself. Non-attachment to the outcome is also key.

All blended with passionately doing one’s best to create the best outcome possible, of course. Whew!

Last week I was hired to do some electric guitar parts by a producer from Los Angeles. He had a technical request for me. A recording technique that would involve equipment I don’t have in my studio.

Being a guy who enjoys “over delivering” in these types of situations, I went out and rented the device. At the rental shop with djent (really hardcore progressive metal) music blaring in the background, the clerks couldn’t seem to get any of the devices they had on hand working.

They finally opened up a brand new one out of the box, connected it to their computer and it seemed to be compatible. I took it home (including driving this was 2 1/2 hours later) and discovered I still had to go through a few steps to get it “installed” with my computer.

Finally it turned out that one of the hardware components on the unit wasn’t working. This was after quite a bit of troubleshooting on my part. Oh, and did I mention there was a deadline with this job?

I emailed the producer and explained the scenario. He got back to me with some troubleshooting suggestions of his own. I’d already attempted them so it didn’t change anything.

He then said he still really wanted my playing on the recording. So I was just going to do it with the equipment and device I normally use. But he wanted it by the end of the next day.

By then it was the end of my day — I’d have to get back to things “tomorrow.” I had some students coming in to work with and had no more time for recording.

It may not sound like much here — but it was kind of a frustrating day. Hours of work and nothing to show for it! This all took place on a Thursday.

And I was feeling a bit anxious knowing I still had to deliver a professional level performance in just a few hours of time the following day.

I had a Zumba class to help my wife with Friday morning, and it was also our only opportunity to get some laundry done at the local laundromat. That Friday evening was our regularly scheduled date night.

I wanted my cake and to eat it too! I wanted to deliver the goods, exercise and have fun, get my laundry done AND hang out with my wife!

Well, as rough as the previous day had been? Friday was it’s equal in terms of being smooth! 🙂 I learned the song, laid down all the parts (rhythm guitar and lead solos) and gave the producer more than what he needed — all within 90 minutes!!

My wife also happens to be a Reiki master and was actually giving a Reiki treatment to one of her clients at that point — they were next door to my studio — so I was kind of restrained in terms of being overly loud. But it all worked out!

In conclusion: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. The very next day or some day soon, Life will quite possibly give you an invisible helping hand!

Some of you may also be able to add TGIF to my conclusion! 😉

Thanks for reading this far,

Davidson

Love Song For Eternal Soul Mates — “Hey Mary Hey”

One of my favourite songs on my new CD is a love song for eternal soul mates. It’s called “Hey Mary Hey” and is the title song from the album.

The inspiration for it came from my wife Mary. Actually, it came about because I wanted to tell the story of how we met and fell in love.

Some people say it has a really cool retro 70’s flavour along with a West Coast vibe. I certainly didn’t set out to write a song with that vibe — I simply sat down with my spanish guitar one day and started getting some cool musical ideas.

As the musical ideas developed, I realized I wanted to come up with some equally captivating lyrics.

I had the sudden thought that it’d be great to share the story of how Mary and I met. I wanted to inspire people with the message of true love and eternal soul mates. Especially in this day and age where so many couples end up on the rocks because of egos clashing.

Rather than write about the tangible day to day details of how we met, I decided to make it about my subjective and soulful experience. It really was (and is) quite a magical and mystical experience for me.

Before Meeting My Eternal Soulmate (Mary)

After having had a couple of long term relationships and done plenty of dating in my past, I had decided to step back from everything in the relationship arena for a while.

sidenote: This ended up being about a 6 year period.

I resolved to myself that I was going to stay single and happy until/unless I met the person who truly qualified as my eternal soulmate.

I also really purified my lifestyle at this point. I dropped drinking and smoking, started eating much healthier food, doing yoga daily — and I also began a daily meditation practice.

sidenote: Many years later, I still live by this protocol although it’s morphed and changed a little. I still don’t drink or smoke,  I continue to make healthy food choices, but I now do more vigorous forms of exercise such as weights and Zumba. And I still meditate daily — although it’s now mostly about letting go of negativity when it arises.

Yeah. A Song About Eternal Soulmates.

Along with all this I was of course working on my music daily. I also went to bookstores, coffeeshops and movies somewhat regularly. Just to get me out of my usual “monk like” routine.

I was open to meeting women — I knew if I wanted to meet my eternal soulmate I would have to put myself “out there” — but I wasn’t attached or fixated on anyone in particular.

I now seemed to have a great radar system that I could trust. I chalked it up to experience plus my new lifestyle. I would simply chat, perhaps flirt a bit, and know somehow that was all that was necessary. In the past I would have been more in my head about it.

Being in my head, I probably would’ve followed through on getting dates, etc. Even though in my intuitive knowingness I was aware that they weren’t the person for me. When you’re in your head how can you hear your intuition?

In some cases I actually did go on dates — but with no expectations. And the dates? Awkward or not much fun.

By the way, I was also affirming daily that my eternal soulmate existed and was in my life. Then I simply trusted, let go and went about my day.

I could feel Mary’s presence even though I didn’t yet know who or where she was. I simply knew. I didn’t know how long it would take, but I trusted. I was in this 100%. I knew she existed because I existed. It was a powerful and uncanny experience to say the least. The opposite of mundane.

Psychic Readings And Synchronicity

At this time I was teaching guitar and piano for my bread and butter. I didn’t have a studio back then, so I used to travel to my students’ homes.

One of the mothers of a student of mine was a fairly renowned psychic in the area. She offered to pay for some of her son’s lessons with a ‘trade” of a lesson for a reading. Since she was a single mother, I thought it would make it easier for her.

Besides, I thought it might be pretty cool. And I definitely had some questions! It’s sometimes tricky doing readings for yourself.

She described Mary to the tee. Her situation, her appearance, that she lived right in my neighbourhood, some of the challenges that we would face when we first got together.

I thought, “Sounds good. Hmm…I wonder if it’s true?’

These kinds of messages came through 2 or 3 readings. Whenever I would see my psychic friend on the street she would ask me “Have you met your mystery woman yet?”

I’d reply that I hadn’t. And I’d also wonder and sense fleeting doubts — because these readings happened over a 2 year period. That’s a long enough time for you to start doubting your intuitive feelings and start listening to the (negative) voices in your head again! Luckily I had my meditation and fitness tools to support with warding off the negativity and to keep me on track 🙂

I figured my eternal soulmate was still in my life energetically speaking — but that the reading from my friend wasn’t accurate.

Along Came Mary!

Back in those days — being a bachelor — I used to devote my Sundays to watching NFL football and golf on TV. It was my way of both relaxing and being inspired by excellence. Tiger Woods was in his prime, and it was amazing to watch his miraculous golf shots.

I would go to the local butcher and get some organic free range Turkey breast and make myself a sandwich to watch my sports with.

One day I ended up standing behind a woman in line. I recognized her from the neighbourhood New Age bookstore where I used to hang out and do Yoga classes a few years prior.

I struck up a brief conversation with her, and we parted ways. Although I did briefly wonder why I felt such a strong “buzzing” in my energy field.

I went home and watched sports and forgot about it.

This was in the autumn. Later that winter, actually between Christmas and New Year’s, I was in the local Health Food store getting a few supplies. And guess who was there shopping? The same woman! From now on, I’ll refer to her as Mary 🙂

She was having a conversation with the owners wife. I overheard a bit of the conversation where they were mentioning New Moons.

Since I regularly chatted with the owner and his wife, I spontaneously jumped in with my own comment about how I liked to start new things with the cycles of the moon.

I don’t recall exactly what we talked about after that, but Mary tells me that as soon as I mentioned my awareness of the moon cycles, something inside of her really perked up. She felt a strong internal shift or click.

It just so happens that I was moving on New Year’s Day to a new and exciting place. I told Mary how excited I was about the move. I also found that out she was (still is) a Reiki Master and crystal healer as well as being a psychic.

We discussed things for a while, and I said I’d love to come in for a Reiki session. I told her it sounded just like what I needed at the time. A great way to start off the New Year.

Now, at this point, I didn’t realize I was attracted to Mary in “that way.” I just knew I felt drawn to go see her for Reiki. It felt good and it felt right.

I’m stuck at this point in the story because things get pretty personal. Suffice it to say that we hooked up. We had some rough obstacles in the beginning. A lot was due to our families different cultures as well as some other things that are too personal for me to feel comfy with sharing here.

But we overcame them together 🙂 And 9 years later (or more, depending on when you’re reading this) I love her more than ever!

Sidenote: If you’re a skeptic on all of this “woo-woo” stuff, that’s fine. I can operate just fine out of the rational thinking part of my mind too.

But if you’re like me, and your inner vision is awake, you know beyond words that there is a silent, formless Divine Presence behind Life. Consciousness didn’t arise from space dust that randomly appeared out of nowhere — rather awareness and light (presence) give life to and shape matter.

Don’t believe my words. Simply take it into consideration. Next time you’re in nature, notice the energy of the plants or stars or the sky. And just consider. Don’t think. Feel your way into it.

Do You Have A Soulmate — Or Dream Of One?

I’ve been told by Mary that there are different schools of thought as far as the terminology goes. Some of the terms in this field are: soulmate, twin flames, eternal soulmate, karmic soulmate. And everyone seems to have different opinions on how to define the different categories.

For me the terminology doesn’t really matter. I only know that Mary is the most accurate reflection of Love I have ever experienced in this world. I am simply grateful and amazed everyday by her loving presence in my life. I must have some really great karma!

What are your thoughts on soul mates? Have you met yours? Do you dream of meeting yours? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below. And if you like this story, please share it with your friends.

“Hey Mary Hey” Lyrics

© Davidson Yeager 2015

Once upon a time in my biography

Soulmates were like the lottery

Seemed like love had a secret key

Winning the jackpot was not for me

I wasn’t bitter and I still had hope

I saw some signs upon that foggy road

Somethin’ round the bend I couldn’t quite perceive

And Your face was veiled in my dreams

You smoke signalled me

Only my 3rd eye could see

You were waiting for me to come

and knock upon your door

You stood there shining like the morning sun

Hey Mary Hey

I could never keep you waiting long

Hey Mary Hey

I could never do you any wrong

All those seasons on my own

I was only halfway grown

This love has made me realize

Soulmates travel through many lives

You flew in on your wings of gold

You prove positivity can never grow old yeah!

You are always shining like the morning sun!

Hey Mary Hey

I could never keep you waiting long

Hey Mary Hey

I could never do you any wrong

You don’t even have to try

Let me rock you with a lullaby

Songs that only we can hear

Conquer all our earthly fears

Hey Mary Hey

I could never keep you waiting long

Hey Mary Hey

I could never do you any wrong

Hey Mary Hey

I could never keep you waiting long

Hey Mary Hey => You don’t even have to try ‘cos I love you.

You May Also Enjoy:

Eternal Soulmates Part 2

Searching For Your Soulmate Song: “Wonderwoman”

Return To Songs By Davidson Yeager

 

CBC Radio And My Music

Success!
Success!

If you’ve been following my story for a little while, you may remember that one of the main catalysts that propelled me onto my current path (with a brand new CD) was CBC Radio. (For any international readers, CBC is the Canadian version of the BBC in the UK).

At that time, (I thought) I was content to simply write and record my songs with the intention of eventually licensing them to film and television.
My wife Mary had been playing some of my songs in her Zumba class — and the response was terrific.

After several enthusiastic people from her class suggested CBC to me, I finally got the message. That’s how the cards laid out to inspire me to reach out to CBC.

Back in the late fall of 2014, I got in touch with the head of the CBC Music Resources Office, Mark Rheaume. Mark got back to me. He is such a genuine and cool guy. He always got back to me straight away — and with helpful and clear information. A very supportive and great contact for me in the music industry.

He’d listened to a couple of my tracks and he told me that they would definitely fit with many of the shows carried by the CBC. However, he also suggested I have an album — or at least an EP — this way, my story would be a little more compelling for the people who had the shows.

So I thought, “Why not? Ok— I guess I’m making a CD.”

This of course led to an impromptu fundraiser  and my EP of 5 songs is now complete. It’s available in my store as a physical CD with cool artwork or on i-tunes.
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Update: CBC Radio and My Music

Mark got back to me recently regarding the status of my music. It’s now officially uploaded into the CBC music library. Woo-hoo! Step one accomplished.

Mark also gave me the contact info for all the relevant CBC radio shows in the country who can possibly use my style of music. He suggested I contact the shows in Toronto and encourage them to play my music. The shows also need to play Canadian artists —  that can definitely help my cause.

I will keep you posted as I move forward with that!

Another cool thing is that if I ever broaden my base of operations beyond Toronto and play other towns and cities, I will have the contact info for the producers of the radio shows in those towns!
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WonderWoman

I’ve got a new song named “WonderWoman.” 

It’s the most rocking song on the album — definitely not for Zumba this time 😉  More of a driving your car kind of song. I literally have a TON of important musical influences — but this song is probably due to early David Bowie along with my bluesy side. I listened to a lot of Bowie at one point during my late teens.

I wanted to have a few different flavours on the album — but still my brand. I think I managed to do it.

Click here for a brief video clip of me laying down some guitar tracks on Wonderwoman.

Here’s a screenshot of my mixing board for WonderWoman.

Wonderwoman by Davidson Yeager
Davidson Mixing Wonderwoman

The drums are being recorded and mixed in Los Angeles by my co producer Gary Gray as I write this. Kristen Rose is on drums again. If you’re reading this after mid April 2015 or so, you’ll be able to sample my new song WonderWoman right here on the homepage 🙂

Thanks for sticking around!
Davidson

New Year Release

This New Year release is a story of letting go. It’s not a new recording — yet! In order to complete my upcoming album, I first need to create more space.

For the New Year, I’m letting go of what no longer serves me. Sometimes it’s easy, sometimes it’s more difficult.

I had a different New Year’s blog post in mind. I envisioned myself dusting and vacuuming, straightening and clearing my studio. Writing about it and taking some photos.

Instead, I just cancelled my guitar lessons website. I won’t bother linking to it in this post as it’ll probably be non existent by the time you read this. In essence it was called Free Guitar Lessons Online — and it was my very first website.

I started building it in March 2009. It was intended as a way to make people aware of my music — but somehow it became it’s own thing.

For almost 4 years, I dove deep into a “system” about learning about the internet. SEO, keywords, how to write better headlines, optimize videos, create a newsletter list, etc.

The site was based entirely on guitar lessons. Mostly with video and written content. Back then the way to earn money on the internet was via Google ads.

People would bid to have their ads placed alongside relevant content. I was a content provider who was able to attract a good amount of traffic.

And even though my first intention was to use the guitar lessons to raise people’s awareness about my music, this soon became obscured by my new plan…

 

My Dream of Passive Income

I would create enough content to provide a steady stream of “passive income” via ads on my site. This would free me up to spend more time recording my music.

The Universe — and the Intelligent order of things — had other plans! Just as my site started to cross the threshold of attracting enough organic traffic via Google to make some decent money from the ads, Google began a drastic restructuring of it’s algorithms.

Most smaller sites got “hit” — even though Google’s intention was to eliminate the “bad guys” who had been gaming the system for a few years.

Even though my site played by the rules, it was hit pretty hard. I was “screwed” — at least with making enough passive income through ads.

I still had enough traffic to make money — but I would need to develop a suite of guitar lesson products and learn how to sell them.

I felt really down at the time — I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t feel the creative drive to develop these products and sell them, but I didn’t know what else to do.

As time went on, I started to pay less and less attention to my guitar lessons website — although I tried a few other strategies just to be sure. I even managed to build a Facebook page on guitar lessons that has over 20k likes. It still gets many likes and views and I stopped touching it several months ago.

Meanwhile, I continued to teach my private students here in my studio and work on my songs and my music. However, that was only on the surface…

 

Getting Honest With Myself

I started getting more in touch with myself about certain core issues. I get up early most mornings and actively meditate, journal and reflect. I used this time to ask myself what I really want out of life.

I began to realize that I had been playing it safe. That the guitar lessons site was a substitute for what I really wanted to do — create and perform my songs for people!

I had to dig deep to get past blocks in my mind that came up with all kinds of reasons and beliefs to discourage me from following my heart.

I’m still working with these old belief systems while I continue to take action everyday in the direction of my true desires.

I have come to feel deeply that I am co creating with the Universe — and that by staying true to myself, the light of the Universe is able to shine more brightly into this world.

By healing these limitations within myself, I’m helping to heal the planet. It’s not just about me. It’s about humanity.

Do you have any limitations holding you back? If so, it’s ok. If you didn’t, you probably wouldn’t be here experiencing life in a physical body!

I’m not here to tell you what to do about it. Just please don’t use any of this as a stick to beat yourself up with! We are all in this healing process together 🙂

New Year Release

I’m telling my story as a way to inspire you. If I can do it, so can you type of thing.

This New Year, look around and see if there is anything that no longer serves you. Then see if you’re ready to let go of it.

Start with small things. Material goods and items (I just let go of a winter jacket I’ve had for almost 10 years. How did I manage to create sentiment around such an item? I had it on when I  “hooked up” with my wife Mary. Lol.)

Work your way up slowly. Very slowly if you’re new to this type of thing. Baby steps are all that’s necessary. Be gentle with yourself, but lean into it.

Wishing you all the best for this New Year of 2015!