The Lovers Tarot card from the Rider-Waite-Smith deck
The Lovers Tarot Card Keyword Meanings
love and relationships, union, desire, partnership, choices, harmony, yearning
Shadow Keyword Meanings (if badly aspected or reversed)
unrequited love, unbalanced relationship, difficulties in relationships, now is not a time for relationships (if someone is looking to manifest one)
Important Tarot Tip:
It’s important to realize that the keyword meanings of cards in Tarot are rarely absolute as they are interdependent on the cards around them in a spread.
For example, if The Lovers card was followed by The Devil card, it wouldn’t look good.
But if it was followed by the 2 of Cups, it would show a love connection growing stronger.
Use your clear reason and intuition with all your readings and you’ll discover more connections and associations between the cards.
The Lovers in Tarot Divination and Daily Life
If you pull out The Lovers card in a tarot reading, it kind of means what it says! Essentially, love and relationships.
There will be some who disagree, but what else could it ultimately mean? With love and relationships being such a major theme in human experience, it’s difficult for me to discount this meaning.
It’s true that it may not necessarily be a message that everything’s coming up roses in that area of the seeker’s life, because that would also depend upon the surrounding cards and the context of the question.
But it would be pointing to love and relationships in some way.
After decades of reading tarot, I’ve come to see that if it’s not a positive note of love in the seeker’s circumstances, then love is a front burner issue.
Even if it’s a yearning for that kind of connection. The card before The Lovers will show what is influencing the theme of love and the card afterwards will show where it’s all leading.
It can sometimes refer to love of a project or work, but this is not as common. If The Lovers shows up to you in a reading, do your best to make the connection to love and relations first before resorting to this alternate version.
Intuition can provide unexpected interpretations that you’ve never thought of, so practice allowing for those to appear. They don’t happen by chasing them, though. If intuition doesn’t come to the table during a reading, stick with Tarot fundamentals.
Some readers will use the meaning “choice” with this card. I certainly don’t have any quibble with that as you’ll see below, but with readings I mostly use other cards (such as 7 of Cups or 2 of Swords) when choices may be involved.
However, I mostly work and teach with Rider Waite Smith (RWS from here on) influenced tarot decks and chances are, if you own a deck, it’s also created from the RWS template.
Apparently, the root meaning of this card was Triumphs of Love and Arthur Waite restored this original interpretation.
However, if choice resonates with you, by all means, use it!
As I say to my students, the meanings that you assign will be the way that Tarot will work for you.
In the older continental tarot decks such as the Tarot de Marseilles, The Lovers card seems to portray a young man making a choice between two women, one of whom appears to be older. Is she his mother?
Some say the TDM is showing a choice between vice and virtue.
The Lovers (Lamoureux is French for Lover(s)) from the CBD Tarot de Marseille by Yoav Ben-Dov
Meditations on The Lovers Tarot Card
However, isn’t love a choice? Whether we open or close our hearts? But I would also argue that when we fall in love it doesn’t seem to feel like a *choice!
So although I can absolutely connect that in the deeper meaning of the card, I choose (irony unintended!) to not use choice with The Lovers as much in tarot readings. It’s not rigid, though and there may be a time where that seems to be the most appropriate meaning.
*I believe in reincarnation, so I also believe that many of the souls we encounter are souls that we’ve encountered in other lifetimes. This is why there is sometimes such a strong pull that sometimes doesn’t make sense to our everyday “rational” mind.
But I also believe in freewill and right action so I also believe that we can make better choices regardless of how our conditioning makes us feel. And that’s one of the ways in which Tarot can support us!
Life is extremely complex and rich. Very difficult to put into words. Anything we say can only shine light on one facet of the diamond.
The Lovers tarot card from the RWS tarot deck beside The Devil tarot card
Notice how these cards reflect each other? Before the "fall" and the desire to be separate and after the "fall." This is also speaking to the Great Work in alchemy or enlightenment and union. We need to experience being separate from our Divine origins in order to actualize ourselves. We undergo an ascension process to our spiritual home after we've broken the false belief in ourselves as limited material beings.
Love & Innocence
In the RWS template, The Lovers card is connected to the story of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden.
This myth connects to the idea that humans were in a spiritual paradise, living in innocence and bliss, but then “fell” from grace.
Note: in the image on the card, it is before the “fall” as it looks like Eve has not yet taken the apple. The fallen state is represented by the imagery in The Devil card. Take a look at the pic just above.
This is represented in the story by Eve’s eating from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. And then of course, Adam ate it as well.
This tree symbolizes the apparent duality our minds live in while we experience incarnation,
Basic polarities such as hot and cold, left and right, up and down are necessary to navigate the time-space continuum we experience ourselves in.
However, the whole “this or that” duality also creates confusion for people because it’s always fragmentary and never the whole or Totality.
We can know facts, but facts aren’t the Truth. And facts can always change.
The Lucifer Factor
Then there’s the Lucifer factor. Lucifer is the fallen angel who rebelled against God and got tossed out of heaven.
Some branches of theology say Lucifer is “the devil.”
Is he the serpent who tempted Adam and Eve?
The name Lucifer means “light bringer.” How could a bringer of light be the devil?
The idea is, that Lucifer was able to rebel only because God had given him free will.
By rebelling, Lucifer then set the stage for humanity to choose to leave a state of oneness for a state of apparent separation.
So humans now have freewill to choose between good and evil. Otherwise, we would be puppets and any “good” we accomplished wouldn’t be actualized.
How Do You Know What’s Good?
There are morals and laws and religous fundamentalists who tell us what is right and wrong. And a lot of it is probably good for us.
But if all we do is follow a playbook and paint by numbers because we’re afraid of making a mistake or “going to hell” or having bad karma, then it’s not an actual good. It’s conditioned. It’s back to the being a puppet thing.
True good can only happen in the present moment and it comes from Higher Intelligence and intuition.
In that sense, The Lovers points to a yearning for connection with God/Goddess/Infinite Beingness
When you look at The Lovers tarot card in the RWS deck, you’ll see an angel blessing the couple (Adam and Eve).
You’ll also see the Garden of Eden, the tree of knowledge of good and evil and the serpent.
An interpretation I learned from Tarot teacher Rachel Pollack is quite interesting:
The angel represents the Higher Self. The Higher Self is the spark of God within you. She also says this angel is the archangel Raphael which means “healing power of God.”
In his book Tarot Beyond the Basics, Anthony Louis writes that A.E. Waite (the W of RWS) was of Roman Catholic background and was aware of Raphael being a Christianized version of Eros or Cupid.
Note: In her deep mythological and kabbalistic book The Fool’s Journey, Maureen Clark says that the angel (or cupid in some decks) represents Eros or Love; her book is based upon Tarot de Marseilles. In many contemporary tarot decks, The Lovers card points to the same themes as discussed here, but not necessarily with The Garden of Eden represented in the imagery.
Compare the Lovers Tarot card from 3 different tarot decks below.
From left to right: Tarot Illuminati by Eric C. Dunne, The Steampunk Tarot by Barbara Moore and Aly Fell, Gilded Tarot Royale by Ciro Marchetti
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Love Heals
Therefore, if we go with the archangel Raphael, one of the messages of The Lovers tarot card is that love heals. This is contrary to the human version of love which is conditional, often immature, and stemming from unmet childhood needs.
This duality in love is sung about in the majority of popular songs. Classic rock band Nazareth sums it up with the title of their hit "Love Hurts."
In the RWS version (pic below), the man is looking at the woman and the woman is looking up at the angel. In other words, the man symbolizes the conscious mind, the woman the emotional mind and the angel the Higher Self.
Adam looks at Eve who is looking up at the angel. This seems to say that the rational mind cannot reach a higher state unless it integrates feelings.
The Lovers card suggests that both partners need to be connected to Higher Principles and values in order for love to connect them in relationship.
When this is done, they are blessed by an Angel of Love.
In real life of course, this isn’t a set it and forget thing. If you’re in a committed relationship, you know that this spiritual connection needs to be constantly renewed. And sometimes it’s harder than at other times, depending upon the surrounding tensions or pressures that are influencing us from within or from without.
The Lovers tarot card from the RWS tarot deck
Because God is a word pointing at a concept so vast that we cannot truly apprehend it, I’m going to give a basic definition here. You don’t have to believe my definition, of course!
Although this definition is not really mine. It's one I've investigated for myself for a very long time and it's what the acknowledged masters have reported through the millenia.
Some folks still believe God is a man in the sky. But once they outgrow that, they often go to the opposite extreme (duality again!) and conceptualize God as a completely impersonal power sort of like electricity.
To me, God is like a person without limits. God is personal if you want Him/Her to be. But we can’t really imagine a person without limits.
That’s why many of the world’s major religions have images of God that we can relate to more easily such as Jesus, Buddha, Krishna and many others.
Connecting with the qualities of these more personal symbols of God is the actual basis of Tantra in the east.
It’s not really about sex and indulging like many believe. There are people who practice that, but it’s considered to be a “left handed” path.
In Christianity, this idea of God-as-personal was first introduced by Jesus in the Gospels when he said we are God’s children and God is our loving Father. In the old testament, God was seen more as a kind of tyrant Emperor type of character.
God knowledge is faith that comes through intuitive knowledge. I am saying that this is the deep meaning of The Lovers tarot card.
God is Love. God is All. Therefore, Love is All.
"The problems of humanity deal largely with the human relationships, and until they are harmonized, there can be no lasting happiness."
-Ernest Holmes
Love, Separation and Duality As Shown In The Lovers Tarot Card
In the guide book for the Tarot Illuminati deck, tarot author Kim Huggens talks about how The Lovers imagery points to the duality that is Life.
The tension between poles.
There is the connection between Adam and Eve as they are both created from the same substance but there is a distance between them as well.
Eve was created from one of Adam’s ribs which shows that they are from the same source “material.”
However, they are also separated from each other after the fall.
Love is the bridge that unites them. With the Angel above, it also seems to suggest that Love can only be there as a bridge when there is a connection to Divine Intelligence as well.
In other words, when the Universality of each being is realized and integrated with their individuality.
Separate egos are incapable of love since they are mostly a bundle of thoughts and memory. They are a product of conditioning. Past karma, present karma, good and bad as well as any future karma created today.
The heart is something deeper and transcends karma when it is allowed to be “heard” above the din of the busy mind.
The Sign of Gemini and Tarot's Lovers
Another interesting idea I noticed is that The Lovers is often associated with the zodiac sign of Gemini.
Gemini is the sign of the twins.
Twins are dual yet connected in that they are from the same pregnancy and birthing.
How To Resolve Duality?
In the legendary book Meditations on the Tarot by anonymous ( widely known to be Russian mystic Valentin Tomberg), he discusses that enlightenment is not reached only through effort as that can become an ego trap ("I" alone did it - the ego).
However, someone cannot sit around or live however they want and expect grace to touch them. Effort is certainly required.
The way I see it, the effort originates from a higher place anyways.
Enlightenment occurs as a synthesis of effort and grace.
The 6 Pointed Star of David
note: in the context of this article this symbol has absolutely nothing to do with politics or nations. The symbol predates any of the contemporary geopolitical goings on.
The Star of David is also a potent spiritual symbol connected with the meaning in The Lovers tarot card.
You see a downward pointing triangle integrating with an upward pointing triangle.
It’s a union of opposites. The two becoming as one.
You can also think of the downward triangle as the alchemical symbol for the element of water and the upward triangle denoting fire.
There’s some passion involved here! Speaking of passion…
Love and Hate
Another set of polarities to consider with The Lovers is that of love and hate.
True Love or Divine Love has no opposite, but remember that we are now considering the world of duality.
In the physical world or “Malkuth - the kingdom” as it’s named in Qabbalah, love and hate are opposite switches in the human experience.
If you pay attention to when you feel hatred, you will notice that you can only hate that which you also love.
Feelings of hate usually arise most often with people close to us who we care about.
This happens when they don’t behave in ways that our hidden (at least from us) emotional immaturity demands.
We want them to love us and it’s never enough!
When they do treat us in ways that we want, we open up our hearts and love them.
And if you’re wondering “what about that person with road rage today? I really hated them at that time!”
That connects to the universality depicted in The Lovers tarot card. Adam and Eve are all of humanity.
There is potential for Love and recognition for universal connection between everyone and everything.
But in the case of The Lovers, it also shows how universal love can be focused in a more intense manner with two people.
Even in group situations where more than two are involved like the relationship is always happening between two people.
It’s always you and other.
You are in relationship with everyone in your life and with Life Itself.
It's both simple and complex. But everyone knows in their hearts that Love is the answer.